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Tag Archives: mother

Happiness is a loaded Starbucks card and a mother with a driver’s license

 “Frappuccino time!”

So you’re walking? “I’m buying”

I’ll go get the keys

The question was rhetorical. I hope yours was, too.

Ready for finals?

“What if I told you no, Mom?”

Or you could say yes

Even when I’m mad, I’m not that mad

“You can’t fool me, Mom

You still think I hung the moon.”

Yeah. But upside-down.

It’s not wise to rub salt in the wound

“Big Deal. I forgot.
Mother’s Day’s overrated”
So is dinner, dude


I don’t think you’re understanding the concept

Today’s Mother’s Day

“No joke? I had no idea.

So what’s for breakfast?”

Exactly what good way is that?

Aren’t you ready yet?

“No one cares how you look, Mom

But in a good way.”


Right, Mom, and Shakespeare was like Michael Bay

Mozart, in his day

Was like Kanye with no cash

“Kanye’s over, too.”